Ciru Muriuki's 5 Things Kenyans Should Stop Saying to the Grieving: "It Is Well"

Ciru Muriuki outlined five things individuals should refrain from saying to someone who is mourning, highlighting expressions such as "...

• Ciru Muriuki outlined five things individuals should refrain from saying to someone who is mourning, highlighting expressions such as "it is well"
• The media figure also rejected statements suggesting the late individual would not want others to feel sorrow.
• Ciru experienced devastating losses after her father passed away in 2020 and her fiancé, Charles Ouda, died in 2024.

Media personality Ciru Muriuki has issued a strong warning to Kenyans about what to refrain from saying when offering comfort to those who are mourning.

Ciru suffered the profound grief of losing two of her most cherished loved ones within a short span of years. Her first major loss occurred in 2020 when her father passed away amid the COVID-19 pandemic, and later in 2024, she lost her fiancé, actor Charles Ouda.

Ciru shared that the loss of her father was her initial experience with sorrow, catching her off guard due to its strength. She mentioned that the phases of grief don't necessarily occur in a straight line, and the second year following a loss can be especially difficult as community support decreases.

From these experiences, Ciru mentioned that she gained understanding, kindness, and a sense of empathy.

What things should you refrain from saying to someone who is mourning?

On a Thursday, November 13 video, Ciru instructed Kenyans on phrases to avoid when speaking to those who are mourning.

"A video containing an extensive list would last four hours. Please focus and stop making these statements," she said.

The initial expression Ciru cautioned against using is, "it is well."

I will hit you because it's not good. It's the opposite of good. Close your mouth.

The second option is, "they are in a better place." The location I wish they were in is here, alive beside me. What is this place that is superior to here?

As per Ciru, informing individuals that their late loved one would not want them to feel sorrow bothers her.

Did they inform you of that? Did they approach you in a vision? Don't reveal to me what my beloved desired.

They would have preferred to remain here

Fourth, she cautioned motivational speakers who claim that although grief is difficult, it will ultimately make those who are grieving more virtuous individuals.

Did I have to lose myself to become a better version of me?

Ciru mentioned that the fifth and most surprising remark was directed at parents who have lost their children.

Assuring them not to be concerned, as they will have another child.

Because a child is similar to a handbag, so that when you lose one, you can simply replace it?

Watch Ciru's video here.

Kenyan individuals responded by including additional remarks:

serro___:

"Everything happens for a reason." I can't think of a reason why my father is gone, but I suppose.

gichane.nelly:

Admittedly, some are strange, but I hope you create a video on what someone should really say.

val_bett:

Please include 'Take heart.' What does 'take heart' really mean? Where is that heart located? What am I supposed to do with it once I have taken it?

serro___:

"Let me know if you need something." I'm not sure why this caused me so much frustration at the time.

What did Ciru Muriuki comment on the 'red-thigh' allegations?

In other updates, Ciru Muriuki responded to online rumors connecting her to the passing of previous partners.

In addition to Ouda, another former partner of hers is said to have passed away.

She called the rumors ridiculous and brushed them aside in a TikTok clip, highlighting how extreme and baseless the tales about her had been throughout the years.